Released.

Today was so overwhelmingly shitty, I can’t even begin to describe it.

I was pulling myself out of dark tunnels only to fall down darker ones.

I was fighting with myself over things I can no longer even remember, that’s how unimportant they probably are in the grand scheme of things, but how powerful my thoughts around them were in spite of that.

I could literally feel my brain turning and turning and turning. At one point the dizziness was just something in the background and I was lost in the rest of it.

I felt some sense of helplessness, anger, remorse, frustration, confusion, rage, disappointment, sorrow, hope.

It was labyrinthian and, there was so much more but it feels very distant now.

It’s hard to imagine that what held me so tightly just a few hours ago could be persuaded to let go.

But this feels good.

When the power over me is mine.

This is a feeling I never want to leave.